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Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Happy and Healthy


11 centimeters and counting! Our little baby Morsel is growing steadily day by day--and so am I! Although I really need to get serious about gaining some weight, now that the first trimester nausea is almost gone...
She or he was bouncing around yesterday during the ultrasound, flexing little fingers and toes...It was incredible. The first ultrasound wasn't quite as exciting since it really just looked like a jellybean with a fluttering heartbeat. Now it's an actual baby with limbs and all!
I have to remind myself now and then that everything that I'm going through will be so worth it. The nausea, sleepiness, mood swings, etc. And the bills. Oh the bills. I just found out that our insurance only covers X amount of dollars for office visits, and I've just gone over that amount, so from now on everything is going to be out of pocket. OUCH! And a certain amount of our insurance money will go towards delivery, but we're still going to have to pay a large sum out of pocket for that as well. But God is good, and He will provide. He has blessed us with this baby and He's not going to just leave us hanging here.
Unless the baby decides to be shy, we will be able to find out the sex on January 21st! I'm pretty sure it's a girl, but I will be thrilled with either a little boy or girl. Any bets? ;-)

Sunday, October 11, 2009

Two Become Three

After two very short months off of any form of birth control, and the help and blessing from our Divine Creator, Andrew and I have successfully started growing a baby!!! When I took the first test, the second line was so faint that I almost couldn't believe it. I hopped around the house excitedly for about ten minutes and then took a second test (a different brand this time). Sure enough, the second pink line appeared fairly quickly, and I was satisfied for the moment. What an amazing feeling, knowing there is something growing, slowly yet surely, inside your belly!

Of course I took another test the very next day JUST to be sure. Needless to say, I'm pregnant. Most people would say to wait until after the first trimester to tell anyone, just in case it doesn't work out...but as it's my first one, and the fact that I'm bad at keeping my own secrets, we just decided to tell everyone right away. If it doesn't work out...well, we'll deal with it then.

I'm pretty confident that this baby is meant to be, and I'm so very excited about my first ultrasound on the 29th. Supposedly the heart begins to beat at 5 weeks, so it should be strong enough to hear by then (it will be 9 weeks on the 29th).

So exciting! Praise God.

Friday, September 4, 2009

News

Considering the abundance of grapevines in my life, I would not be surprised if you already knew that Andrew and I have decided to abandon all forms of birth control and give God the reigns in the babymaking area of our lives. In short, we want a baby. We both feel ready to do this, and I have a peace knowing that I am no longer in control of this aspect of my life. We made this decision the last week of July, and although it wasn't the deciding factor, I'm sure the fact that we both got to hold a one week old baby for the first time had some sway on our decision.

Needless to say, it was a month of excitement and anticipation. I, of course, read everything I could on fertility and such and scoped out the perfect days for babymaking. We went out and bought our first pregnancy tests ever, after having consulted our Baby Expert, Momma D. (who assured us that store brands were just as reliable as the expensive variety).

Since I had only been off birth control for one month, my expectation of actually being pregnant were very low. But I still hopped around with excitement when, on the day that I expected my period, I took my first pregnancy test. I shouted through the bathroom door for Andrew to start the clock, and we waited. One minute...one and a half minutes...two minutes passed by. I leapt up and ran back to the bathroom to check the test (I couldn't just stand there and stare at it--it was too nerve-racking). A vertical blue line had appeared in the "control" box, which meant that the test was accurate, and a horizontal blue line had appeared in the box beside it. I let out a sigh of disappointment. I put the test down and told Andrew the news, who lovingly stated that we can try again the next month. Of course I had to check it one last time, just in case. But the test remained resolutely negative.

A few days later, as irony would have it, I was watching Friends and it just so happened to be the episode where Rachel finds out she is pregnant. I cried a little, cursing Rachel for being pregnant while I was not.

And then I got over it. The bright side: one more whole month of not stressing about having a baby and being a mom. Maybe this month will be the month. Until it's time to find out, I'm going to enjoy my husband as much as I possibly can (and the fact that I can drink alcohol and caffeine).

Saturday, August 8, 2009

Those Pesky Lawns and School Supplies

As I drove to the store after having dropped Andrew off at the church, I saw something a bit unusual. Within 500 feet of each other I noticed a man mowing his lawn with one of those old-fashioned push-mowers, and a woman crouched in her lawn trimming the grass with a pair of scissors. Hmmm...interesting. I didn't realize the economy was that bad.

On a completely different note, I've suddenly realized it's that time of the year again: notebooks and pencils, binders, gluesticks; an array of school supplies are appearing in every store. College students are beginning to plan their class line-up for this upcoming semester, and I'm feeling a bit left out. I almost emailed one of my old art professors for a copy of this year's syllabus. It's my second year out of school, and to be honest I actually miss it, even though I spent almost three of my four school years wishing it was over. I've only finished two paintings since I graduated last year, mostly because I just don't have the motivation. I usually get home from work around 3 or 3:30, so I have plenty of time. And I'm usually not exhausted when I get home. I keep making the excuse that I don't have a proper workplace (which is true), but it's a bad excuse for an artist. I also make the excuse that I don't have the money for supplies, but that never stopped me in college. I used to paint whatever I could get my hands on. Which reminds me how sorely I miss garbage diving in the art building at Houghton. Ah, what treasures I used to find. People would toss out the most interesting and useful things.

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

"Vacation"

Camp, as always, was just wonderful.

I don't think I can remember not enjoying any of the 7 years that Andrew and I have been volunteering at Camp Timberledge in Beach Lake, PA. The first two years we were just general camp help, the next three we were counselors, and now that Andrew and I are married, we were activity directors in '08 and '09. Andrew was the rec director this year, while I instructed rock climbing. Side note: I actually had to do some research this year, since I haven't been in the climbing world since last year's camp! Unfortunately I only got to teach three classes due to the rain. There's always next year!


Being around Camp Timberledge also means being around children, since the camp directors, Jenn and John, have quite a brood of mini-Johns. This year there was an extended addition in the form of a three week old baby girl (Jenn's niece). This of course caused much awwing and ooing among the New Morses, not to mention the fact that the mini-est of the mini-Johns was just too cute for words, crawling around like there was no tomorrow.


I am now very inspired to do...things.

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Good Grief.

Here I am again.

It's been three weeks since Mom passed away. Three weeks of trying not to think about it too much; of trying to push back the emotions. And today I realized something very important: I don't know how to grieve.

I've never needed to know. I was one of those silly people who subconsciously thought that bad things would never happen to her or her family. Of course I didn't seriously believe that, but somewhere inside I guess I had that feeling of security. And so when unexpected and sad things do happen, I don't quite know how to react.

My grandpa passed away in 2006 when I was studying for a semester in London. It was so hard to be in another country and not be with my family during that time. Pop's passing wasn't unexpected, but it still hurt. I cried for a few weeks, and when I got back home to the New York I cried some more...and then I was okay. I miss him, but I'm okay.

I suppose that's what will happen this time...except I was so unprepared for this past loss. We all were. It's a little easier to heal from grief when you know what's coming.

It's funny because I feel awfully selfish. I miss Mom because of what she was to me: a mom, friend, counselor...not just my mother-in-law. When we lose someone we grieve because we're selfish. We'll miss them because of what they were to us.

I'm so thankful we all know where she is; that she is painting sunsets with Jesus and drinking tea with Pop. It definitely helps.